I ate a Muchas Gracias burrito in less than 3 minutes

It was 11 in the morning.

It was so awesome that I stared down at my wrapper in disappointment that it was all in my belly already. I only made it through 1.5 hot sauces.

But Gretchen!! Dude, you can't eat Muchas Gracias burritos. Those days are over!! They are all lardy and cheesy.

Not so, says I.

Get your burrito loving booty the awesome Muchas that used to be an A&W. They have the "Vegan Burrito" on their menu.

Whole wheat tortilla, whole pinto beans, guacamole, lettuce and pico de gallo. All for like $3. I paid a little more because the guy at the drive through flirted with me so much I tipped him.

Really. I tipped the drive-thru guy and then I ate my burrito in less than 3 minutes.

I am not even remotely ashamed.

This day rules.

Not Tuna Salad

I saw a recipe for Mock Tuna Salad in the Happy Herbivore cookbook and it totally inspired me to make my own using ingredients I love.

Her original was good so if you are looking for a standard recipe complete with pickles and celery, check out her website or buy her book!

Here is what I whipped up.

Greek Toona (or whatever way you want to show that it isn't really tuna by misspelling it) Salad

Gonna have to call this not a very appetizing picture. It was yummy, I swear.

• 1 can of Garbanzo Beans (aka Chickpeas) rinsed and roughly mashed
• 1 can of artichoke hearts drained very very well. I squeezed them. Shred them up.
• 8-10 kalamata olives finely diced
• 1/4 cup finely diced red onion
• 1 tablespoon nutritional yeast
• 1 big ol' shake of garlic powder
• a couple teaspoons of roasted seaweed (I just chop it really finely or you can by the kelp flakes)
• a good splash of balsamic vinegar
• a couple scoops with a handy spoon of vegan mayonnaise
• salt and pepper

As you can see, not an exact science. Add as much or as little of the things you like.  Mix it all up and serve it on a bed of  microgreens. Also tasty as a wrap or on bread, anything you like salad on really - In a bowl is also good...

(Psssst - you can buy microgreens anywhere, especially farmers/urban growers markets. I got mine from Trader Joe's because they have totally made me their bitch.)

Lazy Vegan - Salad for Slackers

This salad falls under the "It's-too-muggy-too-cook-and-I-don't-want-to-think-but-it-needs-to-taste-good" category.

Here is how to make a salad - 

1. Take some greens - (I really like a big thing of baby spinach)
2. Dump the greens in a bowl.
3. Take some Trader Joe's Chicken-less Strips
4. Dump them in the bowl with the greens
5. Add some Follow Your Heart Vegan Ranch to the bowl
6. Toss it up with Edward and Son's Organic Onion Garlic Croutons (only eat these if you like garlic breath)

All of these can be purchased at your one stop shop Food Fight!!

It is tasty, it takes about 4 minutes to make and if you don't go crazy on the croutons on dressing it is damn good for you. Now you could do this the hard way. Season some seitan, make a cashew cream ranch, twice bake some Dave's Killer Bread, and go to your garden or local urban grower for greens. But remember, it is too muggy, and you are in no position to think about dinner. So grab these four ingredients, grab a beer, or a or a People magazine, or a "bodice ripper" and indulge. You now have the time. You are welcome. 

(Don't even think about doing the laundry with your free time...I see you, put the basket down.)

Lazy Vegan - Microwave Popcorn

Have you noticed even butter-free microwave popcorn has milk as one of the ingredients?! Well I have, because I love popcorn and I am getting sick as hell of having to clean my pots and pans every time I want to make some. And if I buy another appliance we are going to have to buy a storage unit to house them all so an air popper is out of the question. 


Thus my quest for dairy-free microwave popcorn awesomeness.


The holy grail? Bearitos Organic No Oil Added Lightly Salted Microwave Popcorn - you can get it unsalted too, but why? Come on it is only lightly salted. 

My one complaint - 
Hey Bearitos, update your packaging and website. Seriously, this is a good example of why you shouldn't judge a book by it's cover, but I thought twice about buying this based on the complete lack of design. Good design (and sex) sells - the scary bear and the stale looking popcorn....not so much.

Lazy Vegan - Famous Sicilian Buzzito

Another tasty vegan microwavable burrito from The Higher Taste - or as the call them Buzzitos.

I actually enjoyed this one a little more than the Vegan Supreme. Grab and go Italian food can be a little tricky if you want to avoid animal products, so this was nice and different.

Like before, I nuked it then threw it in the toaster oven. If I could change one thing, I would use Kalamata olives instead of black. I love black olives, but the sharp flavor of the Kalamata's would have really added something.

Easy, vegan, and yummy. Not a bad trio.

Lazy Vegan - Vegan Supreme Burrito

Problem: I am so hungry and there is nothing to eat and even if there was I wouldn't want to make anything because I am too hungry and there is nothing. to. eat.

Solution:

 Thank you, The Higher Taste, for making this!!! This local company sells their goods at New Seasons and many other health food stores. I used my microwave (shhh don't tell Donna) and then stuck it in the toaster over to create a perfect end to my raging hunger.

Who doesn't love heat-and-eat burritos?!

Yes, I could have made this myself. Yes, the beans could have been cooked a little more. But that's all water under the bridge now that my belly is full and I all I had to do was move my arm a little to press some buttons.

Lazy Vegan - gardein™ mandarin orange crispy chick'n

Let me tell you one of my well known dirty secrets. Crap, I guess "well known" sort of negates the whole "secret" part of it, but anyway - I friggin' love Target. Like "carve our initials in a tree" kind of love. So imagine my joy when they started selling this in their frozen section......wait did you know about their grocery section?! Yeah some Targets don't have one yet, but two out of three in Vancouver, do (Vancouver Plaza and Fisher's Landing) and their prices are competitive. Back on topic, drum roll please! - 

That's right delicious, actually vegan, frozen products made by gardein™ (Think your frozen meatless products are vegan? Check again, home fries.) 

Today I sauteed the gardein™ mandarin orange crispy chick'n up with some steamed broccoli and had myself an easy lunch!! The sauce was good, not great, but what you would expect from any frozen meal. Next time I think I will whip up a szechuan sauce to drizzle over instead, but only if I am not lazy, because the sauce is good enough. The chick'n could trick children and drunk adults. It isn't a perfect match, but it isn't chicken, so how could it be. Honestly, I like it a little better, but that may be the self-righteousness talking.

We have our freezer stocked with a variety to try and tell you about. If you have had them or have any of the other gardein™ foods we must try, let us know!

*Small note - so far we haven't come across anything gluten-free. So watch out Celiac's sufferers.