Lazy Vegan - Salad for Slackers

This salad falls under the "It's-too-muggy-too-cook-and-I-don't-want-to-think-but-it-needs-to-taste-good" category.

Here is how to make a salad - 

1. Take some greens - (I really like a big thing of baby spinach)
2. Dump the greens in a bowl.
3. Take some Trader Joe's Chicken-less Strips
4. Dump them in the bowl with the greens
5. Add some Follow Your Heart Vegan Ranch to the bowl
6. Toss it up with Edward and Son's Organic Onion Garlic Croutons (only eat these if you like garlic breath)

All of these can be purchased at your one stop shop Food Fight!!

It is tasty, it takes about 4 minutes to make and if you don't go crazy on the croutons on dressing it is damn good for you. Now you could do this the hard way. Season some seitan, make a cashew cream ranch, twice bake some Dave's Killer Bread, and go to your garden or local urban grower for greens. But remember, it is too muggy, and you are in no position to think about dinner. So grab these four ingredients, grab a beer, or a or a People magazine, or a "bodice ripper" and indulge. You now have the time. You are welcome. 

(Don't even think about doing the laundry with your free time...I see you, put the basket down.)

Camping and Scramble

Our first camping experience not eating animal products has just passed. Pretty successfully I might add, with maybe only a little dairy involvement. 

Normally camping food consists of bologna/lunch meat sandwiches with cheese and mayo. And of course obscene amounts of hot dogs.

Ours was no different  - just ya know way better and far less gross!!  We also prepared this ass-kickin' scramble so we could have an awesome breakfast!

Check it out!

 Meat without meat

Cheese without Cheese

Scramble without Eggs!!

Here is the Breakfast Scramble Recipe-

2  14oz packages of Extra Firm Tofu

1 Yellow Pepper -diced

1 Orange Pepper -diced

1 Large Yellow Onion -diced

2 gloves of garlic - minced

Seasoning -

2 tablespoons nutritional yeast

1 teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon cracked pepper

1 teaspoon cayenne

1/4 teaspoon turmeric

1/2 teaspoon cumin

In a separate pan start cooking your veggies. Make them nice and soft and yummy. Use as much oil as you feel necessary.

In the other pan (I would use a dutch oven or something large like that). Pour a little oil and then crumble your tofu into little crumple bits and add it. (Medium Heat) Then sprinkle the seasoning over it and mix it all up. Add the softened vegetable and continue to mix and heat until it looks and smells good! 

Pretty easy right? Great with tortilla and hot sauce (Tapatio or Aardvark are the faves here!!) We just dumped it in a massive container and packed it in the cooler to heat up for breakfast. 

Press That Tofu

Ahhh tofu. If you are new to tofu, here is something you should know - It has a lot of excess water in it. So in order to not get overly mushy tofu (when you don't want it) you need to drain and press your tofu before you prepare it.

You can do that several ways - Two heavy plates with a can, two large books that you hate, or a tofu press.

I have been using plate method. I don't really like it because my tofu always ends up getting more pressed on one side.

As mentioned in my previous post, I got a Tofu Press on my birthday from my lovely friend Jessica (and Tim).

So here is picto-demonstration (that is a trademarked term of G.Hoyt Inc- so back off or pay royalties) on how to use it.

I marinated in teriyaki sauce this time and then I used it in a stir-fry with amazing greens from my friend's garden, red bell peppers, garlic, scallions and noodles. Delicious!

Check back soon as I am going to go over my favorite kinds and brands of tofu. 

Back to Life - Post-birthday-post

I celebrated my 30th birthday last Saturday with several of my closest friends. In fact most of them were there. It made me feel ridiculously lucky.

We had a taco/nacho bar which was extremely easy to do vegan (we also threw in some real cheese for the non-V's) and a keg of Kirin. Which in no way relates to Mexican food. I just like it a lot.

I got the coolest stuff -

Check out this Vegan purse my lovely SIL bought for me. -

I also got some amazing cookbooks, a book on Food Politics, a couple books about dogs, cookies, a handmade necklace that puts anything at Anthropolgie to shame, a mix-tape and a Tofu Press! (Just to name a few - I don't want to brag or anything) The Tofu Press is getting it's own post later this week.

But it is now time to come back to the world with regularly timed blog posts! Now I know you are excited. I can tell.

So stay tuned because in two days you are going to learn how to press the shit out of your tofu. Intrigued? Grossed out? See ya Wednesday.

Bits of Not Bacon

Bacon bits are a great way to salty up a salad or a potato but since we don't want to kill anything, try these!!

Gretchen's Bits of Not Bacon - 

1/2 cup TVP (you can find it in bulk at Winco)

1 T. Soy Sauce

1 T. Vegan Worcestershire 

1.5 tsp Liquid smoke

A nice dash of chipotle powder

3 T water

Cracked pepper and salt (optional)

In a small sauce pan, boil everything but the S&P and the TVP. It is going to start boiling very quickly so be ready. Turn off heat and add TVP and mix. Dump mixture in to a frying pan. I used non-stick because I didn't want to add oil. Cook until they are dry and crispy. Add S&P as needed.

* If you aren't concerned about you waist line, then fry them up in a little oily. They will be more bacon-y.

I love them on a baked potato with caramelized leeks. They are also and ridiculously good topper for the Potato Leek Soup. Um I like leeks, apparently.

The Sexy Vegan

If you haven't heard of the Sexy Vegan (not meaning Donna or me, which of course you have heard of and are correct, hot stuff here) then you are in for treat.

Brian L. Patton aka The Sexy Vegan is hilarious!! I use that word a lot. But really he is. I recent picked up his cookbook called, you guessed it, The Sexy Vegan, and proceeded to spray diet coke out of my nose as he described the way he was born (via c-section) because "he was all backwards and shit". He also discloses how his friends caught him dvr-ing episodes of food network shows but labeling them Star Trek.

The recipes are killer. The Not Yo' Mama's Cheez Sauce is now a staple here. But honestly just read it for a laugh. Or watch his videos. It is way too easy to take yourself far too seriously with all of the this vegan business. This will knock you down a few pegs. And clear your sinuses.

140 Calories and yummy!! Hoisin Mustard Tofu

I just picked up Isa Chandra Moskowitz's newest cookbook - Appetite For Reduction. Which like all vegan cookbooks has a hella long subtitle - 125 Fast and Filling, Low-fat Vegan Recipes.

Last night I made the Hoisin-Mustard Tofu Lettuce Cups! Unfortunately the recipe isn't on her website so I can't give you a link to it. I guess you will have to get the book at the library! But I will give you the gist!

You need extra firm tofu. Squeeze the water out of it too. Fry it up (with very little oil, like a spray of Pam) with some soy sauce. Meanwhile in another pan use a teeny bit of sesame oil and cook up some diced veggies, like onions, peppers, garlic and ginger. Then add some rice vinegar to them, then add hoisin sauce and mustard. Don't let your hoisin sauce burn. I did. Wah Wah. Then toss the tofu in and mix it all up.

Tofu Cubes

 Veggies

Serve it with iceberg lettuce leaves and eat it like they were little tacos. I ate two servings which was only 280 calories and I was stuffed!!! It was delicious!!!